Just Because I Envy Them

9.08.2009

Passed or Failed

I have news! Finally! I got my grades in Neurology and Oncology. Whew! I thought I failed but I didn't. Jeez. I don't know. I still wonder why I don't feel relieved. The battle is still not over. I'm still trying to hang on. Tomorrow is the start of CHN (Community Health Nursing) and I was assigned to be the leader. Oh, c'mon! The stress! The pressure! Gah!

P.S.
I'm wearing a jacket and a pair of jogging pants. Damn! I feel cold. Is it just me or is it really cold? I had a fever last night and was shivering like crazy. Oh noes!

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9.07.2009

Oh, Mother

I love you but sometimes I wish you could have just aborted me since you told me that you wanted to. Jeez! Then I would have not been stressing out so much with school, family or any of my problems right now. Agree? You won't have any daughter to worry about. No mouth to feed. Only yourself. I just couldn't open this up to you. Why? I'm afraid that you wouldn't care. You don't even know how stress is affecting my daily functioning. Remember when I used to cry every time you leave for duty when I was a kid? You didn't even hold me. You just ran off. What about the part when you said it's okay with you when Lola Auntie asked you if she can adopt me? You're like giving me away.

I wish talking to someone would be this easy. Just like typing the words that you will say because you know that someone won't be able to read it. Haha! But it's hard. Not just hard, it's difficult. You know what I need? A hug. All I need is a hug. What else? To know people are here for me. I'm not asking for all the people. Few is enough. And, I'm wishing one of them would be you. Who am I talking about? Well you just have to find out. You're reading this, aren't you? Haha!

Looking for a happy post? I will. Later. Toodles!

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